Last month we honored the women who planted us. Today is a different reflection — about the men who stood beside the soil and believed something would grow there.
Every dad can treat his daughter like a princess. Very few teach her how to take on the world like a queen.
That is the difference I want to sit with this Father's Day. Not the father who shields his daughter from the world, but the one who looks her in the eye, hands her a firm handshake (and those who knows my dad, knows just how firm that handshake is!) and a hard question, and trusts her to go figure it out.
Mine did that. Ever since I was a little girl, he pushed me to be my best and to never give up on my dreams. He didn't give me the answers. He made me ask the questions and do the research — and in doing so, he gave me something better than any answer. He gave me the joy of figuring things out for myself.
His love gave me confidence. And my confidence gave me the ability to fly.
What a father plants
There is an old line worth keeping: God took the strength of a mountain, the patience of eternity, and combined them to create the thing we call dad.
But strength and patience are not the whole of it. The fathers who shape daughters most are the ones who give us room. Who raise us without too many boundaries or limits — trusting that our curiosity will lead us down the right path. Who teach us, without ever saying it outright, that this world is about hard work, about looking people in the eye, about a firm handshake.
That is what a good father plants. Not a path he chooses for you, but the ground steady enough that you can choose your own.
For the daughters carrying him forward
Some of you reading this will call your father today. Some of you no longer can.
A daughter might outgrow his lap, but she will never outgrow his heart. The men who raised us live on in the way we work, the way we hold our own daughters, the way we refuse to give up.
I reflect today on some of my dad’s wisdom:
Moet nooit opgee om jou drome na te jaag. Want sonder dit, is die lewe net 'n bestaan. En jy lewe nie voluit. ("Never give up chasing your dreams. Without them, life is only existence — and you are not truly living fully.")
Where you were planted
Much of who I am traces back to Ceres, in South Africa — and to two people who held themselves to exceptional standards and quietly expected the same of me, regardless of what anyone else thought. The landscapes of our youth create us, and we carry them within us, storied by all they gave and stole, in who we become.
If your father taught you to bloom where you were planted, then today is the day to tell him — or to tell someone — that it took root.
Other kids found their heroes in comic books. Some of us found ours at the kitchen table, asking us one more question, believing we'd find the answer.
Happy Father's Day. I love you dad.
With love, Christina
PS — Forward this to a daughter who needs to be reminded that the belief her father planted in her still matters — and that she is allowed to bloom there. And she is always welcome to reach out to me.
I would love to hear your stories. Write to me at [email protected]
herloom • bloom where you are planted